Empathy is at the heart of teaching and is an essential social skill for any teacher. You need empathy to understand and interpret your students' needs, feelings and concerns or to demonstrate sensitivity when talking to parents about a difficult issue.

Empathy is also about sensing what is needed and making people feel comfortable and at ease. And when you can read a situation by seeing other view points and using this to create opportunities you are using empathy.

Sometimes it's only when you are in a stressful situation that empathy has real meaning and your skills are put to the test.

So what does empathy mean to you and how do you show it?

Here are a few things to help you develop your skills:-

• View conflict with parents as an opportunity to empathise with a different viewpoint. You need to approach it by letting go of your own agenda and seeking to understand theirs from a place of curiosity which means asking lots of questions.

• Adopt a service mentality when working with your students i.e. when you serve you listen and ask questions to understand the needs and requirements instead of pushing your own thoughts and opinions.

• Develop your political skills by observing your colleagues body language and behaviour in team meetings and trying to work out what they are really thinking and feeling. Studying NLP will help too.

And, if you have developed your skills to a high degree you may need to watch out for a couple things like empathising too much which can lead to you taking on others responsibilities or trying to meet everyone's needs and expectations which can be quite stressful.

Empathy requires tolerance, patience and a sense of curiosity but when developed can be the most powerful tool and skill to have.

Dot Struthers works with school leaders developing their leadership and management skills. and offers practical coaching resources at http://www.merechats.co.uk She also offers personal coaching, HR consultancy and will facilitate management training.