I believe that most of your observations are correct.

It seems to me that China is experiencing an enormous social revolution, much like the U.S. in the 1960s.

Culture does not evolve as quickly as the economy; China's economy continues to evolve at breakneck speed.

The 'China' that today's students are living in is radically different from the 'China' that their parents grew up in. Yet all parents tend to 'parent' in the context of their own life experiences.

Where do today's college students go for advice on modern China? Parents and teachers are living in the past. The government is conservative and fearful of social change. The media is both censored and full of misinformation.

There has never been a culture of 'dating' before marriage in China. The Chinese 'dating' culture is evolving now, but slowly. Female college students on their first 'date' are still interviewing the poor guy for marriage. Even new boyfriends are called 老公, husband. The concept of relationships prior to marriage as a preparation for marriage, as an education about the opposite sex, simply does not exist yet in China.

China will slowly create their own modern social structure, but the current 'bridge' generation is paying an enormous personal price for being pioneers.

Marriage is totally obsolete. It needs to be scrapped as an institution.
Something useless with zero benefit to society.

It doesn't need to be scrapped, Pigsy, it's in so much of a decline that it's essentially scrapping itself. There's always going to be people who still find the 'sanctity of marriage' appealing, so why should they be refused the right to marry if they so desire?

China still has a long way to go before it catches up with the West regarding marriage. Peer pressure is incredible once a woman reaches her mid-twenties or so. Her parents and friends couldn't care less WHO she marries, as long as she has a 'husband'. The biggest problem is that many women are married, yet don't have what we would call a 'marriage'.

They are forced into marrying a man they don't love in order to have a baby they don't want....

Here's an excerpt from a blog I wrote on another web-site. See how much of it you agree with......

'Many of you will have heard of the 'Sheng Nv'. These are what China calls its 'leftover women'. Women in their late 20's, and above, who are still single.

Marriage, in China, is still regarded as a huge cultural tradition. So much so, that parents often choose 'suitable' partners for their offspring.

'Suitability' is based on background, education, wealth, job or career prospects, and has absolutely NOTHING to do with old-fashioned 'love'.

Women are often railroaded into marrying a man they don't love in order to have a baby they don't want.

Heaven forbid that a lawyer, for instance, should fall in love with a lowly country girl. Despite the fact that she may be genuine, loyal, honest, trusting, and beautiful, her background makes her an unsuitable 'candidate' for marriage.

China is teeming with such women. Daughters of what China refers to as 'peasants'. They grew up on a farm, have poor education, yet they know much about the practicalities of life and are in no way pretentious. After all, they have very little to be pretentious about!

The best they can ever hope for is to marry a farmer's son or a guy who works in a factory screwing caps on tubes of toothpaste 6 days a week for a meagre monthly salary.

The lawyer, on the other hand, must marry someone of similar social standing. A doctor perhaps, a teacher, or a nurse.

One such lawyer had the magic wand waved above his head and the fairy-dust that ensued brought forth a very pretty young teacher. Not very long into their relationship they had a huge argument during which the pretty young teacher told the lawyer to essentially 'do some particular thing, or she would end the relationship'. He replied, 'OK, bye!'

The devastation that followed, the sheer desperation in realising that she, the pretty young teacher, would have to go through the whole process of being 'match-made' with another person, quickly ensured that she called back and profusely apologised in order to repair the damage she had done by being so bossy.

As for the lawyer, he took her back simply because he knew what his parents would say if he didn't. As for there being any love between the two of them, perish the thought!

They WILL get married; they WILL have a baby; and they WILL be happy - at least in the holographic minds of their respective parents.

Enter case number 2. A young university student who has a 'boyfriend' who lives in a city about 100km away. He's extremely busy with his work and seldom has time to meet with his so-called 'girlfriend'. She talks about him with complete indifference and has no feelings for him whatsoever.

But, their respective parents have pre-ordained it and decreed that they will marry, so once again, they WILL marry, they WILL have a baby, and they WILL be happy.

Once they marry, the pressure is on for them to spawn a baby. Once pregnant, the doctor will more than likely advise her to refrain from sex until at least 3 months after the baby is born. During what is likely to be the best part of a year, hubby will be required to remain celibate. Of course, a young hot-blooded male is likely to abide by that request, right?

He's nothing more than a 'sperm donor', the provider of DNA, who will soon be off to find someone willing to take away his tensions and frustrations, during which time 'wifey' is rubbing her hands with glee because she already has the house, the car, the bank account etc, and all she has to do in return is to tolerate the constant, never-ending interference from her mother-in-law.

Once the baby comes along, all her love and attention will turn to the child. Essentially her husband is now 'useless' and can do whatever he likes, with whoever he likes, just as long as he doesn't bring shame on the family.

Infidelity is the number 1 cause of divorce in China. Hardly surprising.

Case number 3 involves a rather 'foxy-looking' university student. She's decided that she doesn't want to marry a Chinese man, she's set her sights on a foreigner.

After meeting one, she whisked them both off to the holodeck and began to create her phantasmagorical fantasies.

Sadly, this particular Westerner decided that she was not his 'Miss Right' and subsequently dumped her.

'He's a playboy!' she said to me with disdain. I was going to try and explain to her that there are essentially 2 types of guys in the world. The first one is a guy who is in a committed relationship and regards his partner as being exclusive.

The other type of guy is one who has yet to find such a partner. Essentially, a 'playboy' - at least in the minds of young Chinese women.

However, I was beginning to feel that the subject was a little 'touchy' to say the least, so I didn't try to explain this to her.

What she did infer, however, was that she was not going to have a string of boyfriends that she would allow to share her bed. To her, sex was now completely off-limits until after the wedding.

So come on, how many Western guys do you know who would be prepared to 'buy a car without taking it for a test-drive'?

'If he loves me, he'll wait', she was naive enough to say. 'You're still on the holodeck, aren't you dear?' The words rushed into my head, but I was smart enough to engage my brain before putting my mouth into gear.

I once met a woman who is married to a Western man. She lives in China, he lives in Europe. That living situation is not likely to change in the foreseeable future. However, she's (technically) married, although she doesn't have a marriage, but the bit of paper is enough to keep her friends and family at bay.