Taffy, Taffy...
Your text is good.
Although a bit 1900's.
But you missed what was funny: the innuendo between premature provocation and premature ejaculation (in the case of SB, it's even funnier).

Taffy, you have read and are still reading too much old stuff, 1900's and before. You have a duty to enter the 21st century because you are raising a young child. Your old values and your old style will contaminate her mind by osmosis, mostly that you stay at home with her (but being a stay at home father is in itself a good thing). I know, I know the future can be scary but the past is scarier with WWI and WWII. I would suggest a program for you where every day you force yourself to learn new things about the present: what young people like, who they like (celebrities, singers...), their music, what they hate, etc etc

I am sure you are a loving father. I am sure of that. But you need to update, you need to upgrade, Taffy. Otherwise, you will create a growing dichotomy in the mind of Esther between what she is learning from you and what the outside world looks like. Your idea of sending her to a boarding private school for girls was imply CRUEL. It comes from the Victorian era. Please, Taffy, consider what I am saying to you.