An observer
- 2004-06-13
Michael
If you are posting messages on this forum and responding to messages posted by others, including ad hominen attacks because it is your hobby, or because it amuses you to do so, or because your circumstances are such that other more preferable activities are not currently available, or because your self-declared arrogance causes you to believe that your opinions will/should be valued by others, then that is a positive thing.
However,if you are posting messages on this forum and responding to messages posted by others, including ad hominen attacks, because you have been upset, hurt, offended or angered by the comments of strangers, then it may be timely to undertake some soul-searching.
Of all the wise, profound and witty sayings, quotes, proverbs and messages there are, the one I truly subscribe to is, "Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind." - Dr. Seuss.
Cheers
Jealousy? Sexism? Racism? Ageism? What?
One poster at this site has raised the "question" of whether I am one of those old white men who are arrogant because I have married a young Chinese woman, who is using me for a plane ticket.
Nope. I was arrogant way before that. And my wife is arrogant,too. When I first met her, that was one of the first things she told me.
But a little arrogance is not necessarily a bad thing. The world is a much safer world with the elimination of the Soviet nuclear threat, which took a lot of arrogance actually by Ronald Reagan to make happen.
But, back to my wife and me. The poster may be jealous. I don't know. Only he knows that.
But, why this post at all? Why would he say such a thing at an ESL forum?
Well, one reason I suspect was to upset me and encourage others to do so. Maybe, that was his purpose. Again, only he knows for sure.
Yes, I am easily riled. I admit that. But this goes beyond what I view as acceptable. His comments are racist - that the only reason he can think of that my wife and I would get married is because she wants a plane ticket out. This is a racist comment. That the Chinese woman - and he has actually broadened that even further to include all Asian women - is somehow willing to sacrifice her single life and love life to marry a man simply to leave China. This is such a racist coment.
It's also sexist. He doesn't entertain the idea of men doing the same thing. Only women - and only Asian women - would do this.
And he is ageist as well. Only "old" white men would entertain this idea - not young men.
The comments that he made he might say don't take them so seriously. He has impugned the marriage vows of love that my wife and I have made and have done everything in our power to live up to. I love my wife and she loves me.
If you think I am overreacting, you are certainly entitled to think so. But, those of you who are married, how do you react when your spouse and you are attacked?
Probably a lot like I am doing. Maybe, you would react this way and keep it to yourself. That's not my nature. Someone attacks me, I respond.
But, notice that even under this provocation, I am sticking simply to the facts of his post and placing a logical interpretation on them.
I hope that all such personal attacks will cease.