If you're blonde and have got a nice rack, who cares if your English ability isn't actually that great? Got to get those teenage boys to turn up to classes somehow.

Oh and if you're black, you've got to tell them that you're from South Africa, regardless of the fact that countries such as Nigeria and Kenya use English as their official language.

If you're of East Asian heritage, just don't bother. To them, you're like a Chinese person that can't even speak Chinese. Regardless of your possible actual fluency in Chinese and far superior qualifications in comparison to that dumb white guy in the classroom next to you, you'll still end up getting paid less than he does.

Haven't found any purple coloured teachers yet. But those training center guys are probably working on it, and it will be a new addition to the dancing monkey menu eventually; coming to a training center near you.