It really does go like that for almost every example. The only partial exceptions might be marrying very westernized women and you might find them in the biggest tier 1 cities. They've grown up speaking English, watching english movies, visiting western countries. They grew up around that and these types are even 'anti-chinese culture' sometimes (not necessarily anti-china) but they 'get it'.

but otherwise pretty much what you said. Also, I dont think a lot of western men really understand how it works with Chinese women. I mean, we actually have our own jokes "I'm married so I dont have sex" or 'Goodbye sex" meaning after marriage the wife isn't doing the fun stuff anymore. But for Chinese women its no joke. Marriage is for children. They may believe they are only fertile 1 day a month. There might be astrological issues. So sex is often over after marriage. Its done. Expect months to go by sometimes.

As you said, sometimes you get a few months. after that its an 'adversarial relationship', she wears the pants, you keep yours zipped up, get the second job and basically they only work by degrading, complaining, creating narratives about your failures (to do anything) which is to keep the husband subjegated, insecure, groveling or to simply work work work to please the constantly disappointed wife who will actually devalue his returns harder and more often the more her returns.

Yes, its a very sick thing in the culture. Its ingrained. Its really is a backward sickness.