Living in Wuxing is ok if you’re over 50 as there isn’t a lot to do. You could explore some of the street markets where there’s the smell of fresh offal and cages of mixed ducks, geese, pigeons and chickens which will undoubtedly be the next source of H1N9 or you could go to one of the many small Chinese eating places and sample cooked offal. Besides a few KFC and McDonald’s the only decent restaurant is the Italian, Bella Vita which has a very good reputation. You can also enjoy a coffee at Starbucks which is like a human zoo – passers-by will stare and take pictures of the wai lai ren (foreigners).

If you like to swim, go to the gym and exercise outdoors you will have to leave your togs (trunks, swimmers) at home as the school pool is permanently empty, the gym is cold and dank, nobody has keys to the tennis courts, and you will rarely have the opportunity to run round the track as the air-pollution is as bad as in Beijing.

Apartments in the city are variable in size and furnishing but they share a common problem and that is the lack of Western-style plumbing – there are no s-bends. Whether you are on the first floor or the 27th floor of a high-rise apartment building you will have the constant smell of ‘stale piss’ permeate every part of your place.

The principal, John Evans speaks highly of Wuqing but the truth is he spends more than two days a week hiding in Beijing to escape from the staff and the Chinese locals whom he abhors. Most staff travel to Beijing or Tianjin merely to survive.