It's said that one of the worst things louwai can do in China is to make a Chinese person lose face.I've a true story to relate about this that has got me foxed.
One winter's morning some years ago my Chinese wife and I were shopping near our home in her hometown in Northern China when she was approached by a young attractive Chinese lady.They spoke at length,but I didn't have a clue what their conversation was about.It turned out that she was the owner of a private kindergarten in the neighbourhood.And she begged me to teach there.One of her competitors had hired an FT,and she thought she should do so too.That night she arrived at my house with a contract,only in Chinese,which I signed,as I knew it meant nothing without the accompanying English version.She and my wife got on well together - she said they can be best friends forever.As for the teaching,I said I was inexperienced as a k/g teacher.She said that that would be no problem.I said that she must pay me on a daily basis.Then she agreed and took my better half and me to a good restaurant for dinner.I was treated like the bees' knees.
But in the classroom I was toiling!After 10 days,her attitude had changed like British weather.And she snapped at me that she had no money after I'd taught my last class there!I said to my wife that I couldn't understand how Chinese people can treat you like a VIP when they think they need you.But when they don't need you any more,you'll be discarded like a piece of garbage.I was also annoyed about not receiving 50 Yuan for my last class.I wanted to take it up with the k/g boss,but my wife told me not to care about that,or else she'll look down on us.Afterwards,we sometimes saw that lady while we were shopping.She ignored my wife and I completely.So,what's this thing about losing face?Chinese people seemingly don't care about losing face if they can save money,even if others look down on them when they try to bargain or cheat to do so.But they expect louwai to lose face cheerfully.As I said earlier,I'm foxed!