We all love motivational sayings. They stir the blood, get our minds thinking, and cause us to dream big!
Through the years, famous authors, poets, religious figures, military leaders, and business tycoons have passed along sayings that hint at what it takes to succeed. We love them. We devour them. We quote them. And they do have great value.

Yet, can you name a motivational phrase that has single-handedly changed your life?

Be honest ... do they really do you any good? Does the inspiration last? Usually not. Is there a way to ensure that you benefit from them? I'm going to give you a tip ... one simple strategy that works for me and I know will work for you.

A Story About: "How to Win Friends and Influence People"

Some time back I took a course based upon the works of Dale Carnegie who wrote the hugely popular and enduring book called "How to Win Friends and Influence People". The goal of the course was to inspire us to greater accomplishment, primarily through confident public speaking.

Full of inspiration and motivation, the book was central to the curriculum. You might say it was the Bible to everyone in attendance. It's all about success in life and business. Each class, in addition to our speeches, we had to quote something from the book and tell the other students how these teachings benefited us in our lives.

A Lesson in Motivation

In my observations of the students in the class, I was struck by their lack of belief and passion. It was obvious to me that no one was going to make a quantum leap forward. And the course was chock full of motivational sayings! "What gives here?" I thought to myself.

I thought of my business and my clients. As a home building coach, working with all types of people over the years, I learned one big thing ... you can't get someone to do what they don't want to do.

My clients came to me with one goal in mind; to build or remodel a home. I learned quickly that unless they held a passion for this, they would not make a good client because their chances of success were miniscule.

But, didn't the students sign up for this class? Surely they wanted to succeed. Perhaps, but, succeed at what? Most of them had a loose goal of something like: "okay, this course should help me improve a little". That doesn't cut it if you really want a change.

The Shocking Finale

As the course neared its conclusion, I realized what was missing for them and became inspired to share the lesson I learned from my business and clients. I wanted them to know that success doesn't come from inspiration and motivation alone.

I was the last speaker on the final night of the course. I had developed my message but could I get their attention? "And now, ladies and gentlemen, let's hear from Mel Inglima!" my turn, I was ready ...

Standing if front of the audience, holding the "bible" (How to Win Friends and Influence People") high above my head for all to see, I ceremoniously but irreverently tossed it into the trash! You could have heard a pin drop!

Success and Change Must Come From Deep Wants

As the audience stared in disbelief, I proclaimed that the book was BS and simply full of motivational quotes, inspirational stories, and sayings that stirred us for a moment but wouldn't make a difference in our lives. I wish you could have seen the bulging eyes of the instructor in the back of the room.

But, I went on to explain that all of these words and thoughts came from someone else's wants, someone else's mission, someone else's passion! The key was to take ownership.

You gotta want it. Like the lesson I learned from my experiences with my clients, the results you want come only when your goal is clear. Single minded focus on what you want must be the first step.

Your Guarantee of Success

Just like the saying "God helps those who help themselves", I have found that inspiration and motivation work only when it comes from a deep wanting. But, there's a trick.

To guarantee that those sayings you love so much bring the success you seek, you have to re-craft them. Make them yours. Own the goal and own the phrase. Reformulate the phrase into your own words and include your very specific goal. Remember, it's not someone else's dream you're after and it's not someone else's emotion that will drive you.

When you fully accept and understand this, you'll know why motivational phrases alone don't last. And you'll know exactly what to do to turn the tide.

Mel Inglima, owner of Dream Home Creation, http://MelInglima.com, has spent his life helping people build and remodel their homes, invest and manage their money, and make decisions that have a profound effect on their lives and futures. His work gives him unique insights into what it takes to succeed in life.