Even if you are a goal-oriented, driven achiever, you may realize that fulfilling oneself is not always that easy. Trying to find something new and exciting that life has to offer isn't always the answer. While pleasures in life are satisfying, sometimes the emptiness seems to creep in and touch many sensitive parts of our lives--even in the best of times. What's it going to take to be totally satisfied?

We ask ourselves, "Why do I feel such an emptiness?" We try a new look, buy a new car we really can't afford, take an exotic vacation, or sit on the pity pot feeling sorry for ourselves. We could also "Fake It Until We Make It" because we have a higher regard of who we are not rather than who we are. Somehow we just can't surrender that masquerade...even to ourselves.

Today everyone is searching for love and they will do almost anything to find it. Some are so starved for attention and affection they even resort to taking drastic measures by going before millions on TV reality shows or U-Tube. We've gotten so used to compromising our beliefs and values that we can actually loose touch with reality. No matter what aspect of our lives, this "emptiness" becomes obvious with relationships, jobs, family circumstances, finances, and our future. However, there is hope -- we can change our own world!

Spending time reflecting on who we are and where we are going is not always in our busy schedules. Ignoring the emotions that are being stirred up in our lives is often the case. Let me suggest some ways that may help give you some ideas on how to bring true goodness into your life that will result in total fulfillment.

STEP 1 - Have an attitude of gratitude! Be grateful, courteous, and acknowledge others in a positive way. Think on those things that are positive about someone and then reach out to others with a friendly gesture such as just sending a card, e-mail note, or phone call. Do not take friendships for granted and forget to make a personal contact that could really make a difference. It could be for no other reason than just to say "I was thinking about you". There is no need to wait for a holiday or tragedy before taking the time to spread joy to someone. Acknowledge others with a sincere compliment. Your thankfulness and appreciation will bring good things into your life.

STEP 2 - Take the time to be quiet and alone. Appreciate what's around you...find ways to relax whether it be through music, a massage, prayer, mediation, or a candlelit room. Express yourself in a personal journal to sort out what is going on in your life and what you want to change. This reflection time brings health, healing, and tranquility. Let go of all your problems and worries and never give up your goals and aspirations. Clarity and peacefulness is good for the mind, body and soul.

STEP 3 - Stay active. It is easy to be addicted to the computer or caught up with sports or TV. There was a time when no one really exercised....they just walked, ran, washed their cars, climbed a mountain, went swimming, danced, or worked in their garden. They burned calories while enjoying the good life without fancy equipment and workout videos. Doing something you love rather than what you have to do will give you more energy, positivity, awareness, and excitement. Find a new way to exercise as you enjoy life.

STEP 4 - Set goals and dare to think BIG! Eliminate "I can't" from your vocabulary. If you are not scared about your goals, they may not big enough. Do not keep thinking about the "how" as much as why. Focus on the fact that you do not know how it is going to happen, but BELIEVE it will. Then, just keep working towards your game plan. Visualization, written affirmations, reading inspiring books, and simply dreaming and giving attention to your aspirations with action toward your goal will get you there. If you don't believe me, think about all the things that have come into your life by simply planting a seed in your mind. Ask yourself how you got that car, how you got accepted to college, how you received honors in sports, how you mastered an instrument, how you found your true love... get the picture? Where your mind goes, so will you.

STEP 5 - Change your course of action. Work on disciplining yourself by making a list the night before and complete tasks. Be versatile enough to change the route you take, the food you cook, your hairstyle, planned vacations, the music you listen to, and the books you read. Variety is definitely the spice of life! Boredom will never set in and you will be amazed how invigorating it could be.

STEP 6 - Create meaningful memories. Plan something with your family and friends that you do together and enjoy that event in a way you have never experienced. It does not have to be outrageous, just put some thought into it and have fun! You'll be surprised what can happen when you get those creative juices to explode! Know that you have God-given talents, then use them. When life gets you down, you can always close your eyes and re-visit those wonderful times.

STEP 7 - Always have ongoing traditions you look forward to. Change is great, but so is tradition. Spend special holidays, vacations, reunions, and events with your family. If you don't have any, create your own traditions.... something unique that you and your family will always look forward to every year. Traditions are the bonding force that we need to give meaning to life.

STEP 8 - Be generous. If you haven't understood the saying, "It is better to give than to receive" means, I highly recommend you make it an ongoing habit. It doesn't necessarily have to be a monetary gift---just something meaningful. Give of yourself to someone in need or perhaps forgotten. The best way to give is to be anonymous. Giving is a gift to yourself because it gratifies oneself in every way.

STEP 9 - Find the time for others. Our most familiar excuse is...."I never have time!" Well, I say...find it! I'm sure if we evaluate every minute and hour of the day, we will find some time that we can offer if we really wanted to. The key is to have the desire to make time. Prioritizing the way we use our time is to have an awareness where our time is spent. If someone is important to you, take a few minutes to show him or her you care. Satisfaction guaranteed!

STEP 10 - Forgive and forget. When you carry on the haunting burden of someone hurting you and want to take revenge, remember you're only hurting yourself. Realize that none of us are perfect. Before we spend time condemning, judging, making assumptions, or dwelling on the past, know that the person who hurt or offended you may not even be aware of it. Rise above it and just forgive them---move on! Remember, to forgive IS to forget too. If you hold on to those ill feelings, bad memories, or words that cannot be retrieved, the results are never positive. If you can look at someone in a new and different way ---focusing on something good---you will always be the winner. The same applies when you are at fault. Try to make amends quickly and sincerely.

Take the emphasis and focus off of YOU by removing the "It's All About Me" attitude and see how that emptiness vanishes.

Doris Piña
http://www.DorisJeanPina.com