There are many versions of an old fable about the Devil going out of business - here is my modern version: One day the Devil decided to go out of business and offered his tools on Ebay for auction. Malice, Jealousy, Fear, Hatred, and Pride were easily recognized by his prospective customers and bidding was brisk. However, one badly worn, very small wedge-shaped tool, which also happened to be the most expensive, was proving difficult for his prospects to identify. Satan got a lot of emails asking what this particular tool was and why it was the most expensive. So he added a title and description to the tiny tool that immediately started a bidding war. This particular tool was Discouragement, his most valuable tool, because he could affect many hearts since so few people knew it was his.

Different things will discourage different people at different times. Discouragement can be the result of working and working to achieve something without seeing progress towards the results we want. For example, we might have reached a plateau in our weight loss goal or don't seem to be getting anywhere on the long-term project we've spent so much time on. It can also be the result of wanting something unattainable or out of our control, as in the case of my client, John, who wants a good relationship with his brother, Joe. John has had to accept that his brother might not want the same kind of relationship as John does, that their relationship might always be what it currently is, and that he just has to accept Joe for who he is at this time. Discouragement can also come upon us for no apparent reason. When this happens to John, he's discovered that it's often due to doing less than he's capable of doing, being too passive in his decisions, or being paralyzed by self-pity.

When we're discouraged, it's hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel because we're so focused on our present circumstances. "But it's usually at this time," writes motivational speaker and author Vic Johnson, "that our greatest growth can occur if we'll see the moment as a growth opportunity." He reminds us to remember what we learned in science class - "a body at rest tends to remain at rest or a body in otion tends to remain in motion." Whatever small step can be taken will start the forward momentum, the circumstance will eventually change, and the discouragement will be defeated.

The late Earl Nightingale, a personal development expert, identified three vital points to keep in mind when faced with discouragement. "First, discouragement is often a form of self-pity, an expensive emotion we can get along very well without. And the most effective antidote for self-pity is intelligent action. Next, within any discouraging situation, there's almost always lurking an opportunity for growth, maturity, and future success. There's something good about it. And, finally, discouragement should be kept in its proper perspective. What may at the moment seem like the end of the world won't seem so important in 10 days or won't be very important in 10 months. Take the long-range view and you can't be defeated by momentary setbacks."

But one of the best pieces of advice when faced with discouragement is in a poem entitled Don't Quit, author unknown. One of the stanzas goes like this:

When things go wrong as they sometimes will; when the road you're trudging seems all uphill. When the funds are low and the debts are high; and you want to smile but you have to sigh. When care is pressing you down a bit; Rest if you must, but don't you quit.

Sondra Whitt is a founding partner of Purpose Unlimited, whose purpose is to transform lives, leaders and organizations through the power of purpose. She has a masters degree in Industrial/Organizational Psychology and consults, coaches, writes and speaks on personal and organizational development. She specializes in problems in the workplace, communication, team-building, selection, and finding and living your purpose in life.