What I found was in most parts of China if your tone sounds too meek and gentle you will be subjugated to verbal abuse and an invasion of space by the local Chinese. Being a little tougher in the demeanor will actually get you better customer service by the Chinese

I find that is fairly common all over China. Listen to how chinese speak to the waitresses in a restaurant, no please or thanks, just a barked out command or order. If you are too meek or gentle in your intonation, they will take that kindness as weakness, and you will be hung out to dry. In a mobile phone shop the b**ch behind the counter, even though I was there first, deigned to ignore me to take of a chinese guy who just walked in behind me,and ignored me as though I was a piece of trash that had just blown in from the street. That was not always the case but that is when I learnt my lesson there and then. It is not a culture that rewards the meek and the mild, and no place for a thin skinned westerner. You need not be nice to service staff in China, or, speak to them in a mild and pleasing tone. They are there to serve you, that's it! I roasted her for that, and made sure in no uncertain terms I would not tolerate it happening again. Also taxi drivers can be annoying if you come across as "soft". Again, it is the norms of their culture, and we should not be made to feel bad for speaking as you say.