Are there some actions that cannot be forgiven? Ever?

From a self-esteem perspective, I suggest that you should always forgive yourself no matter what you have done. The past is in the past and you cannot change it, but you can change your future. Your future depends on your own self-image and your relationship with yourself. If you hate yourself and consider yourself the worst person in the world, how are you going to be able to create a good future? Obviously, life becomes easier and more enjoyable if you spend it together with people you like. You will have to spend every second of the rest of your life with yourself. If you stay angry with yourself for something bad that you have done, not only your past, but also your future is doomed.

If you have committed some serious crime (murder, rape, robbery etc), it may of course be difficult to forgive yourself because society may never forgive you. Even if you spend years in prison to atone your crime, you may still not be forgiven in the eyes of others. On the other hand, some people find it more difficult to forgive themselves than to gain other's forgiveness. When you do something that is against your own moral standards (such as letting a friend down or similar) it can be difficult to forgive yourself even if other people do not consider you to have done anything wrong.

If you do not forgive yourself you cannot leave the past behind and become a better person in the future, and if you cannot improve your future everybody else around you will suffer as well. You need to forgive yourself and move on both for your own sake and for other's sake. A person who is full of guilt cannot develop and maintain a high self-esteem, but high self-esteem is needed to live a good life.

Forgiving yourself is not the same thing as ignoring what you have done. A person with high self-esteem takes full responsibility of his/her actions and does whatever is necessary to prevent bad actions from being repeated. Forgiving yourself is not the same as blaming somebody else or turning your back towards your own problems.

What is most important for your future, and the future of those around you, is that you create a good relationship with yourself. You do this by forgiving yourself and building your self-esteem.

Liv Miyagawa - The Self-Esteem Coach

Self-Esteem Coach, Liv Miyagawa, helps adults who want high self-esteem. Apart from through personal self-esteem coaching, Liv Miyagawa can help you to raise your self-esteem through group coaching, self-esteem distance courses, home study materials and other self-esteem resources. She is also the author of The Self-Esteem Toolbox, a book full of self-esteem exercises to boost your self-esteem. Raise your self-esteem http://www.livmiyagawa.com/.